Just now I answered the main phone line at work. It was a young woman with an Asian accent asking for one of our managers. From her flat, speaking-by-rote inflection and her mispronunciation of the manager’s name, it was obvious that she was soliciting something. Very ordinary stuff - I screen at least a few sales calls for this gentleman every workday.
“He’s not in at the moment,” I replied truthfully, although if he had been here I would have said the same thing. “Could I take your information and have him return the call?”
“Yes, please,” she answered. “My name is Jingle, that’s spelled J-I-N-G-L-E.”
I stifled the impulse to say, “Get the fuck outta here, it is NOT!” Mr. Professional. Instead, I let her give the rest of the info and think I was writing it down. She wasn’t calling from an overseas call center, but from a company I’d heard of in New York City. I ended the call and sat back to ponder.
My first several thoughts were probably what you’d expect: what kind of sadist would saddle their child with a name like “Jingle?” I’ve known some people of my generation whose hippie parents gave them names that were a little loopy, but come on. If your name was Jingle, wouldn’t you gladly trade it with someone named Summer or Leaf or Harmony?
Or, wait - could Jingle be a nickname? Maybe an approximation of a foreign name that Americans wouldn’t be able to pronounce? Still, in either case wouldn’t a sensible person adjust her name in adult life to something a little less… I don’t know, hilarious?
Then it dawned on me… OK, I get it - “Jingle!” What else could she be but a telemarketer?
Seriously, people, have you ever encountered someone with a more ludicrous name? Any theories as to what her last name might be?
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November 7, 2007 at 9:43 am
Shama-Lama Mama
I once knew a girl whose first and middle names were “Mary Christmas”! I kid you not! Her sister had an equally fantastical name… that I no longer recall.
And speaking of fantastical, don’t we both know someone who named her daughter with the middle name of Fantastic? But that isn’t ludicrous… I put that in the catagory of “fun and whimsical”!
-Karen-
November 7, 2007 at 10:10 am
Derek
Uh… we do?
November 7, 2007 at 2:25 pm
Toby aka "The Mook"
Well, speaking as the father of a boy named Zephyr (and I’m currently soliciting suggestions for a girl in the making), I think “Jingle” has a certain ring to it.
But seriously, it could well be an anglicized Asian name, like a ‘harmony’ that misfired.
I knew a Korean girl called Hei-jin, who went by “Hedge,” and many’s the time I enjoyed a Yuengling (pron. ‘ying ling’) beer, which isn’t quite what you’d think.
Finally, in one of my more stunning blunders as a journalist, I once was a little too quick with a spell check and transformed the primary suspect in a rather serious human smuggling case from “Jing Ping Chen” to “Jingling Hen.”
True story. We corrected within minutes, but you can still look it up. Google: “Jingling Hen” in quotes. Once it’s in the ether, it’s there forever.
Oh, so the obvious last name (other than ‘Bells”) would be “Ma.”
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0530863/
-The Mook
December 29, 2007 at 4:53 pm
Andy
What if her name was Jing Le?
December 30, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Derek
Hmm… hadn’t thought of that. If it was, then she’s got an inventive way of pronouncing it.
January 4, 2008 at 5:21 am
OutOfContext
When I was living in Miami in the late 80’s, I was awakened early one morning by the phone. The man on the other end asked for “Francisco Bango”. I grumbled, “Wrong number,” and hung up. To this day, that name and the name of one of my occasional customers, ‘Darius Deathridge’, are my favorites.
In an effort to bundle my comments, I will point out that I have been gravatized, or gravatarized, as it were.
Also, I would tell you the name of my fantasy football team if it did not reveal my secret identity. I can say that before I changed it last year it was called the Ham Fighters, after a Japanese baseball team–I didn’t get the name, but it amused me and bewildered my rivals. I never made it past the first round of playoffs with the old name, but the new name (and Adrian Peterson and Brandon Marshall) got me to runner up this year.
January 4, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Derek
Dude, nice gravatar. Longshot guess: is that from Wings of Desire?
Darius Deathridge… that is pure badass. If that guy isn’t already a character in a video game, he needs to be.
Ham Fighters, I like it! I briefly considered changing my team name next year to the San Francisco Tiger Leap. Only reason I’m not is because I still have a lot of affection for E.J. Junior and the Hippos. Oh, and because it’s in horribly bad taste. I’m working on the sequel to the fantasy football post, in which I will reveal the outcome of the Hippos’ season.
January 4, 2008 at 6:11 pm
OutOfContext
Good guess on the gravatar–he does look a bit like Bruno Ganz, but the gravatar is cropped from a picture of one of my favorite artists. I became aware of him via David Byrne’s blog and wrote about him, and included the full picture, in this post.
May 17, 2008 at 3:07 am
miss_sbaloo
mmm…i have a project to do but i really dont know what to name my terabithia!! GOD that is soooo weird !! i feel stupid !!