A Poll of Monumental Importance

Just when you thought my blogging inconsistency couldn’t get any more shameful, here it is – my first post since September.  As even a cursory glance will show, C&B has been mute during a period filled with events of historic significance: the spectacular collapse of American financial conglomerates, bringing the national (and hence, global) economy to the brink of utter ruin; the election of the first African-American President of the United States, who furthermore appears to be capable of getting America up off the mat;  and the lamentable passage of Proposition 8 in California, inserting language into the state constitution to strip rights away from gay people… to name a few.

Therefore, what out of this abundance of profound current events is it that has finally dragged me back to the blogging pad?

This past weekend, my previously blogged-upon fantasy football team, the E.J. Junior Sr. Junior High Grumpy Hippos, ended a dismal 2008 season out of the league playoffs.  In the two coming weekends of playoff games between the four qualifying teams, we remaining six losers have the option of playing each other in meaningless “grudge matches” if we want.

I emailed such a challenge to fellow playoff outcast Heath, our league’s commissioner, owner of the Opa Locka Bowlsnappers.  I reasoned that he would be smarting from his playoff exclusion more than anyone else, because it represents the end of his stunning streak of four consecutive league championships. What’s worse than missing the playoffs after a Snap da Bowl four-peat? Losing a grudge match to the league’s last-place team, i.e., mine.

Heath emailed me back a little while ago to accept my challenge. He did, however, ask me one question that I wasn’t immediately ready for: “What do you want to call the game?”

Having now spent a not-too-long but nevertheless indefensible amount of time considering possible answers, I turn now to you, the reader who somehow is here despite my not having posted in ages, to resolve this hugely significant matter. Please consult your deepest moral fiber, and vote.